Proud to be American |
Happiness can only be found if you can free yourself of all other distractions. Saul Bellow
I guess I haven't had the same focus as that of good ole Chris, as my attempts at creating art --or doing anything for that matter-- have been hit or miss. I still haven't found a way to get my old task-oriented, success-driven life back that I had before the death of my husband. When that life left, it also took my confidence and motivation with it, leaving me with inertia, insecurities and (gasp) procrastination. I seem to have lost the ability to study, and to pray and I have lost the joy of reading--which has been with me since a little girl. I have filled the gap with social networking both face to face and on the internet--good things but insufficient.
However, I am convinced, that I won't be able to live in the old life again as it is impossible to return to yesterday and we only have today; I am in the process in building a new life--some days I participate in that better than others. While I am not pleased with the procrastination and I miss the motivation, it is all a part of the transition. I have learned a lot in the last 16 months about myself, God and about other people. The dust is still settling, and we will see where Maxie will be when it does. Meanwhile I am getting a hip replaced. My first hope was that this would help me to get part of my old life, but I realize that this hip has been has been impeding my ability to move freely for some time, even before I noticed the pain, so in that respect I want my new life to be better than the old. I do want reading part of my new life so I am ordering books by my favorite authors to read while I am laid up. All I can say is: hide and watch and see what kind of Maxie emerges....
The drawing is titled Proud to be American. I found a website that provides a gallery for my art and where I can create a gallery of works of other artists. I am enjoying it very much. http://artofmaxielee.deviantart.com/