Self-Respect

He that respects himself is safe from others; he wears a coat of mail that none can pierce. ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
To free us from the expectations of others, to give us back to ourselves - there lies the great, singular power of self-respect. ~Joan Didion

Tonight I talked to the fella I met last fall--the one who told me to "be who you are," and listening to him brought back me back to center on this. It is funny how I have to be constantly reminded of simple truths--blinding flashes of the obvious, but I tend to forget and try to put myself in a mold that doesn't fit.

This painting is one of my earlier ones--Watering the Lilies, based on a photo of lilies growing in my flower bed. A few years later I darkened the wall behind the flowers making them pop out better, and I am much happier with it. I am pleased with the drops of water.

Rejection

I take Rejection as someone blowing a bugle in my ear to wake me up and get going rather than retreat. Sylvester Stallone
A rejection is nothing more that a necessary step in the pursuit of success. Bo Bennett

I don't have a problem accepting rejection in regards to my art. There are times that pictures that I submitted for publication or exhibit have been rejected. While I feel a little sad at first, I am able to shrug it off because I know that it is part of the process. I am secure in knowing that the gift God gave me is a good one, and that it just may not be everyone's taste--nothing personal intended.

In personal relationships, however, the sting of rejection is powerful, and I take it hard. I can find the roots of that in past toxic relationships. I realize that I need a better perspective on this, and to remember, "People don't do things to me, they do things for themselves." As I am a work in progress I can use these experiences to move onto successful living, rather than let them paralyze me. Now if I could just figure out how to do that.

The painting is Cherries. I finished this painting some time ago and didn't like it so I put it away. I got it out a few years later and saw what was wrong with it, so I worked on it some more vastly improving it. I love how the lace turned out and the sunflowers. The thing that gave me the most trouble? The fabric and the clump of three cherries!!

It's in the eyes...

A bend in the road is not the end of the road... unless you fail to make the turn. ~Author Unknown
Sometimes in tragedy we find our life's purpose - the eye sheds a tear to find its focus. ~Robert Brault www.robertbrault.com

A friend asked me today if I was doing better, and I told him that I was. "Yes," he said, "I can see it in your eyes." What I could see in his eyes was concern and I realized that it has been there for awhile, because he was aware of some of my struggles. I don't question the troubles, though, because if I did ask God, "Why me?" He'd be apt to say "Why not?" Difficulties are part of the human journey. I am happy to say that I haven't shed many tears since Easter. My hip is better and I am planning to start working in my garden, which is looking pretty neglected. I am ready for a more upbeat attitude.

This is a painting in process. The coneflowers are emerging. I am not happy with the one on the left but the beauty of oil paint is that things can be changed. The finch may not be placed right but it is staying where it is. I am excited to see if I can actually render a bird in paint, as I have never done it before. Today I shipped two paintings I sold from my Facebook page. Whoo hooo!!!

Curiosity

The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity. ~Dorothy Parker
I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious. ~Albert Einstein

I always wanted to know stuff. My Dad and I were always so good at Trivial Pursuit that no one would play with us; we won with a lot of random --sometimes useless-- facts rattling around in our brains because we were curious about things. If something catches my attention I want to know more about it. In the old days I searched the library for information. If there were any questions I had, the answer was at the library. As I said before, when I was younger, I taught myself how to paint and draw from library books. This is where I learned about reflected light--there is always reflected light in the shadows of an object-- and how the surrounding colors affect subject. This painting is an example of that. Learned that from a book, I did.

I still want to know stuff, but I don't have to go to the library to find it. Now I have Google. I love Google.

This painting is Blue Ribbon, because this African violet in a vintage pitcher won a blue ribbon at the fair. So I painted it. It is funny how the simplest things will give me the most trouble-- in this case it was the leaves. Sometimes I think the painting needs something more on the table, but then again maybe not. So it stays at it is.

It's All Good

To dare is to lose one's footing momentarily. To not dare is to lose oneself. ~Soren Kierkegaard

I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it. ~Pablo Picasso

This weekend was good. When I arrived at the venue where I was to speak, I was told I only had 15 minutes slated for my talk. I drove halfway across the state for only 15 minutes? That threw me off balance, but the talk went well anyway. I find that I am too much of a good girl, always doing what I am told. So would the crowd walked out if I talked 30 minutes instead of 15? I doubt it. But it is all good. I made new friends, drove places I have never been, slept on an Aero bed, tried Thai food for the first time, and got myself from one end of the state to the other with just me, God and rock n roll. I was able to visit my oldest grandson, who is in the Navy, on the west side of the state. Yes, it is all good.

This painting is titled Field and Stream, and is another radiant heat panel. The barn is from a photo I took and some of the trees I think, but I made the rest up, including the stream. I do recall driving around on a blustery day taking pictures of clouds--would you believe clouds give me trouble? They are supposed to look as if a bird could fly through them, not solid like a bunch of marshmallows. Tricky.

Later Gator!

Even though I have been posting nearly every day, I won't be for a bit, as I am going out of town. I am speaking --in front of people :o-- on behalf of a Fellowship I belong too. If you pray, pray for me, as I am not a proficient with the spoken word as I am with the written. See you later!

OH, you want a picture? OK a drawing of Amiralty Head, a lighthouse on Whidbey Island WA. Gotta pack now.

Small Beginnings

"Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin." - Zechariah 4:10 NLT

Don't be afraid to give your best to what seemingly are small jobs. Every time you conquer one it makes you that much stronger. If you do the little jobs well, the big ones will tend to take care of themselves. ~Dale Carnegie

I am humbled by the followers of my blog, and the fans of my Face Book art page--Art of Maxie Lee, some whom I have not met face to face. It still surprises me that people are interested. I was reflecting today how I got started in writing on the web. About 12 years ago I joined an online self-help email group. The first time I posted a share to that group I was so tense that my heart raced, as if I was actually standing in front of that goup in person. Over time sharing in this group became easier and I became good at it, often sharing in their chat room. Out of that forum came a smaller gratitude group where I share every day things I am grateful for--something I have been doing for about 8 years--maybe more, I can't remember. I have discovered that I have this urge to entertain-- I certainly wouldn't want my shares to be boring-- and I have used the daily writings to tell stories and to attempt to make people laugh. I confess I can be the class clown. I have become quite comfortable with online writing, but the best thing is that I have formed beautiful friendships. So writing a blog has been natural and easy and I am comfortable most of the time in posting it where others can read. Thank y'all for reading my thoughts and responding to them.

This painting, Summer Gate, is done on a radiant heating panel, which actually heats the room. It is done in acrylic and was a commission. It is rather a flight of fancy but it makes me smile. The garden gate is in front of a real home in my town, I took pictures a few of years ago and I have used the fence in a couple of paintings. The gate still exists but something happened to the roses, and it is sadly plain now. I confess I borrowed the bird house from a Fred Swan picture. Sorry Fred.